So outside of my childhood friend’s uncle and Mr.Miyamoto’s Mii, I’ve never come close to knowing anyone that works at Nintendo.

Will that little fact stop me from coming up with marketing gold and offering it in the form of a blog post to Nintendo’s marketing team for free?

…Nah.

So, I’ve come up with a couple of ideas for the successor to the Nintendo Switch, with its presence essentially looming over the company at this point, the announce has been immenent for like… 3 years now, and I’m not entirely certain that there wasn’t some sort of demonic trade-off made by the company after the WiiU that they could find success in the Switch but in return, they have to forego another console release for 10 years.

Okay, I’ve actually just been playing a lot of roguelikes that offer tradeoffs of power now for a long term price, but doesn’t it at least feel a little like something similar may have happened to Nintendo? No? Alright, just me then, fair enough.

Okay, okay, I came to my desk promising free ideas to one of the largest companies in the world and so far have offered nothing more than speculation thus far, so without further ado, free ideas:

MiSTer Switch

Fans of emulation will probably know where this is going, but to explain to those of you blissfully unaware of the existence of the ever expanding market of handheld emulation devices, there exists a world in which you can purchase a device today (assuming they aren’t sold out [I don’t believe the base versions have been for some time]) that will provide you with a screen, d-pad, 4 face buttons, shouler buttons, and, here’s where it gets cool, dear reader, a cartridge slot, called the Analogue Pocket. It’s made to be a modern interpretation of Nintendo’s Gameboy and can play games from any model of gameboy from the DMG to the GBA. It works by emulating the hardware those devices used and it’s really quite the cool (if prohibitively expensive) little device. Full transparency, despite a few internal struggles, I do not own one of these devices (I’m a bit saucier of an individual and find android and linux-based [often more affordable and capable] software emulation devices [I’ll write a love letter to my Ayn Odin 2 one of these days for those looking for a device like this])

Anyways, preamble aside, the idea is simple. One Device. 8 adapters. It can play any cartridge or disk from any Nintendo console. The future is recursive, Nintendo designed the Switch with years old hardware when it was brand new, they didn’t need 4k then, who needs it now?

Plus they can market it as the Mr.Switch as if it’s the Switch’s dad and I just think that’s great.

Wii2

That’s right. We loved the Wii, never heard of the WiiU, now’s the time baby, the much anticipated (and definitely only) sequel to the Nintendo hit console, the Wii2. Really doesn’t get simpler than that. Sony is the only company in mainstream gaming utilizing the numbered sequel system as it was intended and I think it’s time we get comfortable with having one console name and then 5 or more iterations on it.

The Super Switch

I mean, honestly, calling a console the Nintendo and then following it up with the “Super Nintendo” was so cool. This one’s actually less of a joke and more of a wish. If the next console came out and had SNES or Super Famicom energy, I’d personally be thrilled. I feel like Nintendo tried to recapture this energy with the “New” branding of the New Nintendo 3DS, but why not go all in here and take it back to the roots?

DS or Bust

Again, more of a wish than a joke, this is me looking back fondly at the Nintendo DS with rose-colored glasses knowing full well that I never loved having 2 screens on a console, but there’s a specific part of my childhood tied to the Nintendo DS and my inner-child would be thrilled enough to buy a new DS even if my outer adult would go on to regret it unless ergonomics were very much more a consideration this go around.

Actually though

I’m beyond thrilled for a new Nintendo console to release whenever they’re ready to let it ascend from their basement and see daylight. Whatever it is, I’ll likely end up owning it regardless of power or performance because we all know that it’ll be the only place to play the newest Pokemon game or whatever beloved Nintendo franchise we’re all chomping at the bit for.

I’d be over the moon to see 4k, 60fps support, but again, I’m looking forward to playing Pokemon on it, and as an old man, the best Pokemon games are 2D and modern Pokemon doesn’t seem interested in utilizing the full capability of the current hardware, so I’ll keep my expectations low and be happy with whatever Nintendo decides to put out.

I would love to hear any wild marketing ideas or what you guys are actually hoping to see in the upcoming console in the comments below.

As always, wishing you the best, and thanks for reading,

-Eckophix